The Seven Ages of …

As long as I can remember the way we have calculated a dog’s age is the old 1 human year is equal to 7 doggie years formula. Well it turns out that is entirely wrong, wronger, wrongest! My friend Richard sent me an interesting article that proposed a slightly complicated – to my math-challenged mind – calculation which sent me scurrying to find something that didn’t require calculus.

The American Kennel Club has come up with a graph that had me returning the old slide rule to the cobweb covered drawer from whence it came. Their calculations are based on the fact that puppies mature at a faster rate than human offspring during the first two years of their life – as an example a nine month old dog can become pregnant. After the second year growth slows down to a ratio of between 3-9 doggie to 1 human years. That number varies depending on the size of the dog. It’s interesting that in what are considered giant dogs (100+ lbs) the growth during the first two years is slower than in dogs of a smaller size and the ratio higher with advancing years.

Until now we had thought of the Hounds from Hell as being in their 80s but according to the AKC they are still mere pups barely entering their sixth decade. Which still makes them the youngest members of the household.

A demonstration of groaking as it has been refined
both in manner and technique over the past 11 60 years.

The word for July 14 is:
Dog /dôɡ/: [1. noun 2. verb]
1.1 A domesticated carnivorous mammal that typically has a long snout, an acute sense of smell, nonretractable claws, and a barking, howling, or whining voice.
1.2 A person regarded as unpleasant, contemptible, or wicked (used as a term of abuse).
1.3 A mechanical device for gripping.
2.1 Follow (someone or their movements) closely and persistently.
2.2 Act lazily; fail to try one’s hardest.
2.3 Grip something with a mechanical device.
Old English docga, of unknown origin.
And whoever wrote these definitions at Oxford did not know that dog is god spelled backwards.

Author: Willym

A senior with the heart of a young'un

4 thoughts on “The Seven Ages of …”

  1. Are you trying to butter them up?

    I am sure the HFH are as surprised as you to realize they are not yet pensioners. Back to the salt mines with you, puppies!

  2. In addition, I was always told each year in a cat’s life was 6 in human years. I learned about 10 years ago, that wasn’t true either and overly simplified. Our cats at 9 are equal to 52. By that figuring, I’m about 12-1/2.

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